The Mysterious Mystery of The Missing Keys: Part 2

The story so far.....


It's the day before a big gig in The Club, and the keys are missing. We have established that they are not in the empty yogurt pot where they normally reside. Even after checking several times they were still not there. A conversation with Vinnie has revealed that they keys might be in the company van, which is at his house. But he is in Spain. So I called the person who was meant to be feeding his cat to check the house for me and get me the keys. But she has went out of town for the weekend.

How she is going to feed the cat while she is out of town is somewhat of a mystery, but that's not my problem right now.

So I call back Vinnie, and explain the situation. He says he thinks there is another key to the van in the safe. Fortunately I have a key to the safe. Unfortunately it is at home, and I am in the restaurant office. 

So now I need to get a bus from the restaurant, to my house, and then come back to the restaurant to open the safe to see if the key is actually in there, which it might not be. To then go to Vinnies house to open the van, to get the keys which only might be in there.

So that's exactly what I did. I got on a bus and was forced to sit next to quite possibly the chaviest woman I have ever seen in my life. And her dog. I was forced to listen to her conversation about her and her friend getting into a fight. From what I can gather it all had something to do with a bottle of brown sauce. But that's all I could really understand.

After what seemed like hours I arrived home and got the safe key. Not keen on boarding another chavtastic bus I decided that I would get a taxi to ferry me around the city, and I would damn well get Vinnie to pay for it.

So I got a taxi, to take me to the restaurant to open the safe, to get the van key. Amazingly the van key was actually in the safe. Step one of the plan was complete.

Step two involved going to Vinnies house and hoping that the key was in the van.

If it wasn't there would be no way to open The Club. The doors would remain locked, the lights would remain off, and there would be 650 very pissed off people demanding a refund. All because my boss moved the keys from a yogurt pot and forgot where he put them.

The taxi arrived at Vinnie's house, the van was parked in the drive way, this was it. The moment that the past 2 and a half hours of searching had been building to. In just a few short moments the rest of my weekend would be decided. Would I spend the night in the club with 650 drunken morons or would I spend the night out with my friends having left a carefully worded sign on the front door with Vinnies phone number should they wish to complain.

The taxi departed, but not before giving me a receipt so I could claim back these expenses. I slowly and cautiously approached the van. If the keys weren't in here the night was pretty much a bust.

I looked through the window, nothing. They were no where to be seen. This was not a good sign. I opened the van door, climbed inside and began to rake. I found some hula hoops, a half drunk bottle of water, an empty packet of M & M's..............

and the keys to The Club!!

Success!

The day was saved. And to top it all off, I now had a van at my disposal. Which was just as well, because in the time I had spent searching all over Aberdeen for these fooking keys I had meant to have gone food shopping. Plus it was now raining.

It had been a stressful and highly irritating two and a half hours. It was just as well the promoters had wanted to come in on the Friday. 

If they hadn't I wouldn't have known until I turned up on the Saturday and spent two hours searching for the keys when I was meant to be setting up. I felt a sense of relief, the night will go ahead as planned. I will add the 2 and a half hours I had spent on this missing key escapade onto my rota so I will get paid, and now I had the company van at my disposal until Vinnie got home.

Good times.

The van did not start.

I had to walk home.

In the rain.

I got wet.

Bad times! 

That's All For Now

Until Next Time

Have A Nice

Andy G

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The Mysterious Mystery Of The Missing Keys: Part 1

I had a rather irritating experience the other day and I thought I would share that with you.

Vincents and The Club have been closed for a couple of weeks for holidays. Despite the fact that everyone was going to be off for two weeks. Vinnie (the owner) took a booking. A booking for a gig in The Club. A very big gig. A big name DJ was coming to play, and  Vinnie was on holiday. As was the other manager. Luckily for him I didn't have any plans. So the night was left to me, and me alone.

There were 650 tickets available, and they all sold out very quickly. This was clearly going to be a very busy night. I had spoken to the promoters a couple of times the week before and we had discussed various arrangements.  They were aware that I now have a day job, so they could only get access to the building in the evening or on the actual day of the event.

So last Friday I was hard at work at the office, when I received a text, a text from one of the promoters. They needed access to The Club to drop off some rather expensive equipment. I arranged to meet them at The Club at 6pm that evening.

The Club is below Vincents, they are both in the same building, but you need a separate set of keys to access the club. We keep these in a yogurt pot in the restaurant office. I should point out it's an empty yogurt pot. Well, it's empty except for the keys, there's no yogurt in it. That would make the keys all yogurty.

So I met up with the promoters and let them in the restaurant and went to retreive the keys to The Club from the yogurt pot. 

However the keys were not in the yogurt pot. The keys were absent. I stared at the yogurt pot, it was definitely empty. There was no denying it. 

So here we were.

Myself and two promoters with a hell of a lot of expensive equipment, and locked out of The Club. Fortunatly there is a connecting door between the cellar of Vincents and The Club. Luckily this was not locked, so the guys could at least dump the equipment.

After dumping the equipment the promoters left, and I spent 45 minutes searching the building for the keys. I called the other manager who was also on holiday. He was the last to have them, he said he left them in the yogurt pot. I called the cleaner, he didn't even know there was a yogurt pot with keys in it. I then sent a text to Vinnie The Owner asking if he had moved the keys.

He called me immediatly, this was our conversation:

Vinnie: Andy you've got me a little bit worried.

Andy: Well you're not the only one. Do you know where the keys are?

Vinnie: Are they not in the pot?

Andy: No.

Vinnie: Are you sure?

Andy: Yes.

Vinnie: Maybe I posted them through the letter box.

Andy: No, they weren't there.

Vinnie: They weren't mixed in with the mail?

Andy: No.

Vinnie: Are you sure?

Andy: Yes.

Vinnie: And you're sure they're not in the pot?

Andy: Yes Vinnie, I'm currently looking at an empty yogurt pot.

Vinnie: Ok. Call the cleaner and ask if he's got them.

Andy: I already called him. He doesn't know where they are.

Vinnie: Call him and ask if they were in with the mail.

Andy: But he would have said if they were. Plus I was in before him so it was me that took up the mail.

Vinnie: Ahhhhh, right well if you're sure they're not in the pot.

Andy: Nothing in there.

Vinnie: And they're not at the front door.

Andy: Definitely not there.

Vinnie: Well, ermmm, they might be in the van.

Andy: The van?

Vinnie: Yeah, maybe.

Andy: And where's the van?

Vinnie: At my house.

Andy: And where's the key to the van?

Vinnie: In my house.

Andy: But you're in spain?

Vinnie: Yeah.

Andy: Alright. (Insert long pause here) Does anyone have a key?

Vinnie: Yes! (Excitedly) Caroline is looking after the cat. Call her, she can go to the house to get the van key, to check the van, and she can bring you The Club keys.

Andy: Alrighty, will do.

So I have to call the girl who is looking after the boss's cat, get her to go to his house, get the van key, and check to see if The Club keys are in there. Luckily I already know this girl so I quickly gave her a ring. 

She's not in town. 

She arrived in a small town over 150 miles away ten minutes before I called.

Fook.




To Be Continued.................


Will Andy find the keys?

Will the gig go on?


Will anyone actually bother to read all this shid?


Find out tomorrow, at the crack of noon.

That's All For Now

Until Next Time

Have A Nice

Andy G

How about subscribing to this lovely little blog? Wouldn't that be the one thing missing from your life? Just surf your  way on over to http://www.TheNewAdventuresOfAndyG.com/ and put your email in the box that says "subscribe." Simple really. Unless you're a mong.

If you do subscribe then you shall become more powerful than the secret love child of Luke Skywalker and Superman!